The Degradation of Pizza

The Degradation of Pizza

Okay.  I grew up in Connecticut, a suburb of New York City.  So, naturally, I believe that New York style thin crust pizza is the pinnacle of pizzas. Also, back then pizza consisted of crust, tomato sauce, mozzarella cheese, some garlic, and, maybe, pepperoni or sausage.

Nowadays, almost every pizza store offers many toppings, some of which like peppers, mushrooms and even onions make sense. But pineapple on a pizza is an abomination. Well, I just found out about Toppers Pizza.  As the name implies, they specialize in what goes on top of the pizza. It's enough to make 'Lucky' Luciano rollover in his grave.

Here is a list of toppings that are available: jerk chicken, bacon, pickles, macaroni noodles, taco sauce, taco meat, tortilla chips, tater tots, spinach, and artichoke hearts!

These concoctions are not pizza!  We need to come up with another name.  Any suggestions?

May the Spirit Guide You? I Hope Not!

Vice-President Joe Biden, a man I admire, is not the person I would associate with a bigoted, racist segregationist.  But, the association is there and the veep probably did not even realize it. This photo has to be the worst photo-op of all time. 

Avocado Meant What?

The name for the main ingredient of guacamole dip has a long history.  It comes from an unpronounceable Nahuatl Indian (Aztec) word “ahuácatl" which means "testicle." It is thought that name was applied to the fruit because of the shape or because it was thought to have aphrodisiac qualities. So, of course, the name had to evolve into something that we could ask for when making the dip.  "I'll take two testicles for my guacamole, please" would not get us very far. Of course the slang "balls" does not help very much. So I guess it would be more couth to say, "It is cold enough to freeze the avocados off a brass monkey."  But it would make no sense in the movie, Goodfellas, for Tommy to have said,"Just don’t go busting my avocados, Billy, okay?"  Oh, well.

Why Not Beer for Communion?

Most people know that wine is at the very heart of Christian communion (except for Methodists and a few other denominations that use grape juice... definitely a poor substitution).  But why not beer?  An award winning brewery in Jerusalem did some research and, with the help of geneticists from Tel Aviv University, were able to brew some beer using a strain of wheat that was available about the time Jesus was supposedly walking around there. Just one sip and it was clear why wine was the preferred sacred drink of the Bible.  

But beer brewing has come a long way since Biblical times. Just look at how frequently brew pubs are popping up. Perhaps a solution to so many people leaving religion (22.8 % unaffiliated in 2014 and rising according to the Pew Research Center) could be reversed by serving beer at communion. And, not just a sip, the whole chalice! 

Another Delayed Commemoration

The other day I wrote about Queen Elizabeth II's birthday being officially celebrated, not on her birthday, but in June.  Well guess what?  The Spaniards have a tough time commemorating things when they happen, too. 

Miguel de Cervantes, author of Don Quixote died 400 years ago on April 22, 1616.  So there were events all over Spain celebrating him -- on April 23rd! Like the Brits, the Spaniards like to postpone things.  The celebrate on the day of burial rather than on the day of death. So, they commemorate his death not on the day he died, but on the day he was buried -- the first time.  It seems his remains remained lost for almost 400 years.  They were discovered by archeologists and he was reburied on Jun 13, 2015. Maybe they should be celebrating in June to join the Brits. Now I am really confused about celebrations! 

National Bobblehead Hall of Fame 

Yes, there is one in downtown Milwaukee and they will be inducting their first member on Saturday.  No, it is not Scott Walker, at least not this year.  It will be a man dear to the hearts of Cincinnati.  A man who is well known for his antics both on and off the baseball field.  It may be a bit of a gamble, but the first inductee is Pete Rose!

CONGRATULATIONS??

Happy Birthday Queen Elizabeth II... Maybe.

Today Queen Elizabeth II turns 90 and the pubs will stay open for two extra hours to celebrate.  But before you plan on drinking more warm beer in those extra hours, you have to wait until she celebrates her birthday on June 10. Huh?  Well it seems that the Brits only like to celebrate birthdays in the summer -- better weather.  This tradition started with  King George II in 1748 and has been going on ever since.  What the weather has to do with longer hours in the pubs remains a mystery.  So, I guess we have to withhold our best wishes for a few weeks.

But, the Brits have a great idea.  So, because I was born January 4, I have decided to have my official birthday on June 4.  Oh, wait.  That's Kathie's birthday.  So the pubs will have to stay open four hours longer!  Now, that's how to celebrate!

A Little Big Mac??

I read today that McDonald's is going to offer different Big Mac sizes.  But, before I get into that, isn't "Big Mac" a misnomer.  It is McDonald's so it should be a "Big Mc,"  or "Big Mike" at least.  It is "Mickey D's" isn't it?  Any way, McDonald's is test marketing what I assume is a Little Big Mac, a wonderful oxymoron. So I expected a "Little Big Mac" and a "Big Big Mac," but, no. To get around that problem, they renamed the Big Mac "Grand Mac," which, to me, should be bigger than a Big Mac in the scale of things. So big is now grand. The little one is called, "Mac, Jr," which, I guess, is "Son of Big Mac."  The Mac,Jr. is a single pattie.  But, I thought a single Pattie was an unmarried Irishman, Pattie McDonald. Oh, well.

Welcome to my Blog!

I often read or hear about things in the news that I find to be strange, at least to my bemused mind.  I often share them with my wife, Kathie Duckworth, and, at times, she laughs.  At other times she gives me a bewildered stare. Uh, well.

So I thought I would share some of these observations to anyone else who might be interested.